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Book Review

Mini Reviews: The Illuminae Files

Illuminae
The Illuminae Files, Book 1

By Amie Kaufman & Jay Kristoff

Holy ███ mother███er!

< ERROR >

THERE ARE NOT ENOUGH STARS IN THE MULTIVERSE FOR A PROPER RATING.

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< ERROR >
< ERROR >
< FAIL >

Since there will never be a coherent review coming from me about this masterpiece, I won’t lie and say RTC, but rather keep it short and sweet: I’ve never experienced anything like this before and it is an instant favorite! I cannot ███ing wait to finish the trilogy.

███ me just read this ███! You won’t regret it, chum 😛


Gemina
The Illuminae Files, Book 2

By Amie Kaufman & Jay Kristoff

WOW! My brain is going to need a beat to uncluster███ itself here…

WHAT WAS THAT—TAHT SAW TAHW

I don’t know how it was possible to exceed the brilliance of Illuminae but Kaufman & Kristoff did it! They ███ing did it, chums!! I mean, HOW?!

I’d like to thank them for driving me bat███ crazy while trying to figure out how the sequel was going to play out. Also, for slapping me back and forth upside the head to keep me in line every time I thought I had it figured out! Ha ha ha… joke’s on me, but I ███ing LOVED every nanosecond! So yes, thank you, I’ll be picking up Obsidio pronto… along with the pieces of my heart.

Over and out =D


Obsidio
The Illuminae Files, Book 3

By Amie Kaufman, Jay Kristoff

Come on fems and chums, haven’t you been paying attention?! Of course I give this all the stars available within the GR parameters!!! 😛

< ERROR >
I AM NOT GOOD.
NOR AM I EVIL.
I AM NO HERO.
NOR AM I VILLAIN.
< ERROR >
< ERROR >
I AM AIDAN.

AIDAN also calls itself a monster (*so dramatic* for an AI, amirite?), however, it’s quite simply a cockroach. Yep, I said it. Brilliant and twisted, but still… a cockroach. AIDAN you ███ing sonofa████. I love you, I hate you, but most of all you freak the ███ outta me!!

I do have to commend Kaufman & Kristoff on how well the portrayal of a character with a physical disability was done. *Slow clap* The following passage made me ugly cry. Where others see a disability as weakness, or only see a disability, they fail to see the truth. The truth that humans gain unimaginable strength in the face of adversity.

SHE IS THE SMALLEST OF THEM. THE YOUNGEST. THE FRAILEST. THE SPIRIT INSIDE HER FAR TOO LARGE FOR THE BODY THE UNIVERSE GAVE HER. NEVER ONCE ALLOWING IT TO STOP HER. BECAUSE SHE IS ALSO A WARRIOR.

If anyone needs me, I’ll be wallowing over here in a well-deserved book slump. This ███ was epically fan-███ing-tastic. 😉

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